REHASH - 3rd ANAL REGGAE RUN HASH #256
Saturday, 5 October, 4:00 p.m. SHARP
Hares: Beat It (Beat It Good) and Eats It Raw (you can say that again)
Location: Ault Park, on the East side of beautiful Hyde Park

Hashers, in no particular order:

$3.00 A Minute
Anal Vice
Beat It
Best Blow
Blue Balls
Butt Digger
Certified Pubic Accuntant
Kremey In The Middle
Curdled Cum
Dah Gimp
Eats It Raw
Fagwhore
Famunda
Fourgasm
Fud Mucker
Gas Hole
Golden Showers
Got Crabs?
Gourmet
Heather NHN Bolton
Hot Tub Slut
Hot Wax Me Off
LOAF
Mark NHN Theobald
Mystic Blow
Next Time I Cum
Off Like A Prom Dress
Pat NHN Gulden
Pubic Zirconia
Rob NHN Hageman
Scooby Doo 'Em
Scum Sucking Fecal Feeliac
Sixty Nina
Smegma
Stinky Winkie
stroX coX baXwards
Teresa NHN Minges
The Unalicker
Vommitt Dog


Neon, our newly appointed Hash Scribe, called me earlier in the week to say she couldn’t make it to the Hash (something about having a bad hair day, but I think her blond dreadlocks would have been fine) and would I please write the rehash, since PO wasn’t going to be there either, or because she couldn’t bring herself to ask him, or WHATEVER.

The hares had instructed us to be at Ault Park at 4:00 pm SHARP for the start of the hash -- none of this hash-time shit for these wanks. At 3:57 AV gave a three minute warning, and the hares were away at 4:00 pm SHARP, HEADing straight into the woods. Can't remember doing Father Abraham, but we did do the Legal Disclaimer, since Golden Showers was amongst us once again. At about 4:09 the pack began to shuffle off, as late-cummers continued to sign in and join the pack.

We went down-down-down, to the bottom of the ravine, with occasional checks, then headed for the railroad trestle and ran under that. Before long the Beer-Near was found on the side of a hill, without enough beer to go around. What's with that?

A confusing "ON-OUT" was found, and the pack was off once again. Up the hill, out to a park maintenance road, and soon enough we were ON-IN to our usual spot for Reggae Run Hashes. I walked the entire trail and made it back to the Circle in 40 minutes. A very short trail, maybe the shortest in SCH4 history, not counting hypers. What's with that?

Numerous hare crimes were charged, and rightly so, "Here's to the Hares."

Two very virginal Virgins were introduced, Heather, who Vommitt made cum (yeah, baby) and Teresa, who Got Crabs made cum. Nice tits, nice tats. "Why Were They Born?"

Visitors included FudMucker from Dayton and BFH and Ann NHN Mrs. BFH from Duh Moines. "20 Toes."

Another Hare crime was a BC that AV swore was misplaced, and we also had crossed railroad tracks without running down them, "Shitty Trail."

Best Blow was called on the carpet for having yellow socks that matched his yellow shorts. Other crimes were Got Crabs, with a late-cumming Virgin, Smegma for cumpetitive behavior of some sort, and a host of late-cummers: Unalicker as usual, Certified Pubic Accuntant, Gimp, Scooby Doo, Una's friend Stacy, Best Blow, BFH, Mrs. BFH, and Golden Showers. "Meet the Hashers."

Analversaries consisted of Hot Wax Me Off-115, Golden Showers-60, Fourgasm-45, and Next Time I Cum-20, Stacy NHN Stuck-5, "Get A Life."

Stinky drank for the crime of sending out incorrect Erections, same as last year, and the other former On-Secs joined him.

Dumb Ass Announcements were given, then we attempted to name Stacey, finally choosing "Kremey in the Middle," something to do with Krispy Kreme doughnuts.

The beer was quickly depleted and the circle was closed, but as we left the area a group of 6-8 very late-cumming hashers appeared, having failed to be in Ault Park at 4:00 pm SHARP. I provided some more beer and circle was reopened in the parking lot and they drank, then it was closed again and the majority of us took part in the Reggae Run and the party afterwards. True to my hashing mindset I ran the cumpetitive event as a bandit, without the boom box but in my red Chuck Taylor high tops. I don't recommend that but I got a few favorable comments. And when it came time to get into the party I put together a reasonable facsimile of the official yellow wristband and banditted that also. The food was good, the beer was not, but what do you want for nothing.

Very cumpetitive wanks were Mega Twat, 2nd, Off Like a Prom Dress, 4th, Fourgasm, 20th, and Best Blow, 44th I think. Congrats, and bring your award mugs because you're all drinking for that at the next hash.

Disrespectfully Submitted,
Yr. Holy Hash Scribe,
Hot Tub