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Rehash Hash # 263 – The Turkey Hash (I guess that’s like corned beef hash?) Saturday, November 30 – Thomas More College, Crestview Hills, in the great state of Kentucky or as the uneducated buckeye state hashers like to say “Kintuckee” Hares: Mr. & Mrs. Raw – also known as Butt Digger & her hash husband Eats It (I want to celebrate my 100th hash by being the hare)Raw. What a great day! Fantastic weather, balmy almost. Well, that’s what I was imagining. Cold, windy, cold cold cold! So as usual, I pull in the parking lot at 15 past the hash hour and SURPRISE! The pack is gone! How could they leave without me?!? I guess they were too cold to stand around. With Unalicker in tow, we fly through the parking lot where we meet up with Fourgasm, with Da Gimp pulling in behind us. As we started to run, Lube My Johnson ran up to join us. Latecummers…again. Who ran off without us? Anal Vice Beat It Blue Balls Butt Digger Dah Gimp Drop Shorts Eats It Raw Famunda Fourgasm Fucking Nothing Fudge Tracker Gas Hole Got Crabs? Gourmet Hot Tub Slut Hot Wax Me Off Hyper Hand Job Long Dong Silver Lube My Johnson Mystic Blow Neon Knockers On Her Knees Pubic Zirconia Scooby Doo 'Em Scum Sucking Fecal Feeliac Skid Marks Stinky Winkie stroX coX baXwards Suck This The Unalicker Wile E. Coyote Following the pack arrows we hit the trail, into the woods and out, over by the office park where we meet up with the pack, obviously confused by some kind of circle jerk. The first thing I notice is Gourmet’s hat – he has a shark on his head?!? Eventually we find trail again and head into a wooded area. Anything to block the wind is good today. Today’s trail includes some trails in the woods along a long hilly road that meets up with the main road in the complex, over by St. Eliz. Hospital (I know this because today’s trail is about 3 miles from my house!!) BEER NEER, those of us lagging behind can see the pack enjoying those ice-cold beverages (so appreciated on a warm day like today) but can’t get to them. With a little help from our friends we get by (I think there’s a song in that somewhere)….the overgrowth in the woods and join them for a cold one. Trail continued on back into some wooded areas and over Summit Hills CC golf course & swim club (this is where I lived every summer as a kid – no really, my parents or anyone else they could find dropped me off there and left me there all day, every day – sometimes I even went back after dinner….if you had 8 kids wouldn’t you try to get rid of them every chance you had???) Sighhhhh..those were the days (I LIKED going there every day!) ON-IN. Now, the circle is ready to start and Mystic Blow tells me AV has something to help with my notetaking….hmmmmm….wonder what that is? Well, don’t be jealous but it’s a mini talk-book!!! So now, I can just tape record EVERYTHING and don’t have to stare at notepaper during the circle. For today’s hash, I didn’t get to use it in the circle, so let’s see what my notes say: Trail: Too many circle jerks, too balmy…..S-H-I-T-T-Y T-R-A-I-L…etc. No Virgins, No Visitors today – could it have been the cold weather that kept them away as well as half the normal pack? Hashers who are virgins again because they haven’t been hashing (didn’t I tell you last time hashing does a body good?): Hyper Hand Job & Suck This. Hare Crimes: Well, either they were just too good at their job or we were just too cold to think of anything. However, someone did mention that the TP was tied in cute little bows. Latecummers: Looks like they left without a lot of hashers today – Lube My Johnson Fourgasm Da Gimp Got Crabs? Suck This Famunda Unalicker Neon Knockers PACK CRIMES Unlicker tries to make the group drink for leaving without us – typical deputy type, trying to be above any criminal activity. Drop Shorts – she stayed in the car with the heater on instead of running trail- weather challenged hasher Unalicker & Skid Marks – talking about some competitive event on trail Hot Tub Slut & Drop Shorts – missing the BN Unalicker – called Neon by her MGN in the parking lot OK, Unalicker, we just can’t have a Sergeant At Arms with so many crimes against her – straighten up!! Gashole – how embarrassing! He made a big wet spot on the floor! SO WHERE’S THE TURKEY HASH WE WERE PROMISED???? Gashole drinks again for today’s lovely weather. Eating in the circle – StroX CoX BaXwards, Da Gimp, Skid Marks (guess they didn’t get enough to eat on Thanksgiving)….well to be truthful, everyone on THAT side of the room was eating at some point during the circle while those of us on the NO FOOD SIDE just had to starve for another half hour. No whistle – Fu*#ing Nothing – when one Grand Mattress drinks…..Mystic! Happy B-Day: Unalicker and Skid Marks (WOW!! Skid Marks turns 65 – see how young hashing keeps you looking??) Analversaries: Stinky, what are they? I didn’t take my notes fast enough (I was busy eying my new talk-book):
And one very special Analversay – Eats It Raw – 100!!!!! And welcome to the centurion club! All centurions drink (you know who you are) |